avrelia: (Zenobia)
or venting it, to be exact.

So, I have an Amazon Prime subscription, and often I choose "slow delivery" to get a $1 bonus for my kindle purchases. And then I decide to use my bonuses and buy something and expect to pay a substantially reduced price... Except it won't get reduced, because it is not sold by Amazon! ::grumble, grumble::
avrelia: (Pirate stuff)
For your viewing pleasure:




From here.

Stuff

Feb. 4th, 2009 01:50 pm
avrelia: (Figment)
I love winter. I truly do - I love it when starts and there is fresh snow all around (and I don't have to climb with a stroller through it), I love it when it ends, and the spring is so much prettier after a long cold winter. But I hate when it goes on and on, and generally in February I am all ready for it to be over. Except it is not.

I cannot write here much, since Daniel learned how to climb onto our bed, and I don't have a safe space anymore. And I have too much stuff to write before LJ. ::sigh::

Life is generally okay. Except that I am sick, and D., too. and other stuff. I still think of myself as living in Toronto, then remember that I am not and a trip to TO is a whole day trip with D. And I don't want to go anywhere, anyway...

I wish a happy birthday to [livejournal.com profile] onetwomany, wherever she is now. But I dearly wish to know where she is and how she is doing.

in the happier news, the last [livejournal.com profile] the_royal_anna post about Buffy and Spike made me happy as only her posts can. I am glad that people still talk about my favourite shows.

Especially since I just cannot get attached to any other show. Both time-wise and desire-wise.
avrelia: (Cabaret)
I've noticed a tendency throughout my flist in these last months: we comment less. I comment less, you comment less, everybody comment less. I read (well, skim) my f-list almost every day, but too often I have nothing to add or just don't have time to write anything meaningful. I assume everybody else is plagued with the same lack of time. or a different lack of time. another reason is of course, that our interests diverge more and more - I cannot find time to watch much of the often-discussed movies and TV, many of you are hardly interested in small children (but they are very funny to look at!) we converge in the universal topics like weather (do YOU have as much snow as we?), health or politics (Russian, Canadian or USA - take your pick). So our entries look like monologues instead of heated or relaxed conversations of the bygone days. Or is it an illusion? I should go back in time and check, though it won't be telling - I never posted as much as I thought of posting. maybe it just seemed that way because we all discussed the shared interests more. Monologues or not, I love reading my friends and see what is going on in your life or just what do you read or watch nowadays. I love my friends (YOU), and I miss them when they disappear from LJ-world.

So, there: even if I do not comment, I am here, I read and I care.

but occasionally I feel like I am twelve and I really want to get comments. ;)
avrelia: (Pirate stuff)
I feel like I am the most boring person ever - what with not posting and lurking rarely commenting. I can't even claim that I was awfully busy and/or exhausted.

I just worked and slept and read books and didn't find it in myself to write in LJ about it. :) and the longer I don't post...

oh, whatever.

the work is as usual and require a separate post. So does the reading - actually several posts, that I am writing for the last month. The sleep is of no interest to anyone except me.

What's left? the weather, the TV and the news. I spent this April at war with the weather. I was mentally kicking the gloomy sky and seething when watching the forecast and waving my fists at all silly winds.

At this moment I am winning.

What is about TV? I watch more or less regularly Bones and Ugly Betty.

I didn't like Bones when I tried it last year, but this season I caught one episode, and now I am loving it more and more. Nothing much to discuss though about it - I just enjoy watching.

The similar feeling I have watching Ugly Betty - I enjoy watching it, and I love their self-mocking humour, and good acting work, and the way the show can find in every character something to sympathize with, but it's just not a deep discussion material for me. maybe not yet, of course, but so far it is just silly fun.

I tried Heroes - back in autumn, but then I found I am making myself to watch it, and what's the pleasure in it? I do love Hiro (though I like the actor himself much more than the character - based on some bits of information I caught. Anyway, I think I'll give it another try now at the end of season.

Occasionally I watch House - or, to be exact, I watch Hugh Laurie there.

I never managed to get into The Office - I tried, but it is just not my show.

I keep forgetting to watch some shows.

I actually managed to remember watching Drive - I liked some of it, didn't like other parts, wasn't sure the premise was going to work for me in the long run... But what's the point anyway? I probably only need to start watching shows which full first season is assured.


The news consist of the new courses we started taking with my husband: Introduction to Creating Writing. So far the most fun of it is going to the course together and doing exercises. Our first exercise scenes were the best (in our humble opinions :-p -- and judging by the reactions.) Next up - a poem. Cue my misgivings about it. I have no idea how to write poetry in English.

Well, that's pretty much it. Next up: memes
avrelia: (Default)
...will probably save me from the pain.

I think I have one of my wisdom teeth coming out.

I generally firmly stay on the position "live and let live" - in relation to my teeth, anyway. And I kind of hope I will be much wiser with my wisdome teeth. But it is an unpleasant feeling. To add the strength I think of babies and partizans (they aparently got it worse).

on the plus side, husband finally got his benefits set up = 80% dental care. Sweet.
avrelia: (Default)
My husband came from his class one day and announced that he learned cool stuff today:

Before twenty years old we think of ourselves as being older than we are, after twenty we are thinking that we are younger than we are.

Well, duh!

At thirteen I thought of myself an adult, at sixteen I felt I was an old, wise crone.

Now I struggle with the fact that I did grow up, and I should behave like a responsible grown-up I am (on the other hand, if all other adults think the same, who is acting as a grown-ups?)

The husband learned it in connection to marketing strategies, of course: goods meant for sixty year olds are being advertised as for forty years old, and so on.

But thirteen year-old me (as well as my friends) was fun. Climbing the trees was still acceptable pastime in our circle, but jumping through elastic band was out as too childish. Do people outside of Soviet Bloc jump through elastic band? It was fun. Besides climbing the trees we were reading books (rather adult books), having political arguments (perestroika!), and listening to the rock music.
avrelia: (Default)
I hate shopping. I mean I am not exactly adverse to wandering through stores, browsing through merchandise, picking up a thing that attracts my attention, figuring out if I can live without it, and leaving the store a happy owner of a new thing. This is all fine.

But when I actually need something particular, and soon, and I am racing the stores, hunting down that One Thing I really need to have right now… That’s terrible. Nothing fits, the only available sizes are not mine, and if they are mine the thing looks terrible on me anyway, and if by incredible luck it fits just right, I am in no way can afford it. Or it is made from an awful fabric like polyester. I have a distaste for acryl and polyester. Am I an elitist bitch? By the end of the day I am exhausted, and cannot see anything but red. My shopping companion annoys me as well as the universe. I buy the first thing I don’t have an extreme aversion to, because I cannot stand the thought of going to another store.

I have a lot of things to say. I even wrote down some of them. Maybe tomorrow.

Hugs to everyone.
avrelia: (Default)
Russia is in the news again. Can I trade terrorist acts for doping scandals? Pretty please?
avrelia: (Default)
I spent this week generally feeling tired or running like crazy around Toronto, looking for a job. The job keeps hiding from me. I decided to try and apply for a job in a bookstore, and went through most of the Chapters/Indigo/Coles in Toronto trying to engage in a meaningful conversation with managers about Life, The Universe, and my possible employment. Most of the times I actually managed to do it. That’s not to say I’ve got a job as a result. I guess, my complete lack of retail experience is a hindrance here. But may be it will still work out – some of the stores will be hiring in a month, and I told that I will remind about myself at the time.

But what do I do next?

Anyway, by this afternoon I felt very dead and had a headache. Slept couple of hours, got up without waking up and tried to write a cover letter for a position I really like. Do you want to know my painful secret? I suck at writing cover letters. Really bad. They turn out too clichéd, trite, and formal, or flippant and silly. No wonder I am unemployed – I cannot convince anyone to hire me. With all the useful job-searching stuff I forgot about writing. I have to write how many things? A lot. A while ago I finished a short story I was writing since May. Sent it to some friends for reviews and beta-editing. Some are still replying, but I already know what has to be changed – and am I editing it? Nope. Btw, it is in Russian, so I can seriously offer it to read only to a very small part of my flist.

Writing stories are so much more pleasurable activity than writing cover letters, yet I spent more time with the latter. ::sigh::

Apparently trying to catch up all Writercon reports is positively impossible, as well as commenting on all of those that I did catch up. Generally, I’ve got an impression of a happy blur with some minor annoyances.
avrelia: (not here by Tissa)
I was listening to one of my favourite singers, Yanka Dyagileva, today. Her songs are not just angsty, they are "The Angst" in my book, they are passionately depressing, they are full of sorrow and heavy despair, and that "break free from the skin" feeling, and something else, sweeter, softer that I cannot find a name for. She died - may be suicide, may be not - more than ten years ago. But, strangely, her songs make me feel better, in a "Dude, life is beautiful" way.
Or, sometimes, in a "Nah, life is much better, why am I distressed over some nonsense?" way.

I also remember myself in the last year of the high school - when I first heard of her - and the teenage me makes older me smile.
avrelia: (not here by Tissa)
The missing point of a previous post was my own folly of not commenting, yet expecting comments. Thank you, guys! I've got a well-needed ego-boost, a date, and a slight feeling of embarrassment.

So I decided to entertain you with minutes of life in the last two weeks.

We have a pigeons' nest on our balcony. At least pigeons think it is a nest, because they have two eggs there. I think that it is a small pile of twigs. But we cannot really throw them away now.

Yesterday I was running around Toronto. Not around ALL of Toronto, but still big stretches. The fact that it was +32 degree C added a certain flavour to my walk ( a rather ssweaty flavour). In the evening we had a barbecue party though. In a park. It was very nice, and not really hot, and the river was gurgling merrily from afar... But you see, I have a problem with barbecue parties. May be I am doing something wrong? See: we come to a park, find a nice place, make barbecue, have fun making it, eat it, drink whatever, pick up our stuff and go home. Are we missing something? it seems so many troubles just to eat in the fresh air... may be there should be vigorous sports games, or lazy laying on the grass, gazing into the sky... But before we are too hungry to do anything but eat, and after we are too full to do anything at all.

We have the most amount of table per 1 square meter. Six tables in a small one-bedroom apartment. Stranger things have happened.

After my failed interview I realized that there are a number of things I have to do before I get a job. Like finally change my driving license from BC to Ontario. So, I went to Downsview Park. And of course, I went the wrong way, but decided to walk to the place I needed through park. The road that exists on a map was really hard to find. But I didn't want to go back, and, finally I discovered a narrrow gravel path and followed it. I found myself in a parallel time and place - this was so unlike everything I've seen in Toronto. A huge medow, so the only visible sighs of civilization were aviation angars, fragrant uncut grass, large colourful butterflies, weird-looking birds singinging and flying around...

I've changed my driver's license that day, don't worry.

And, finally: a raspberry-mango cheescake is a right kind of a cheesecake.
avrelia: (Default)
I noticed that I haven't been commenting much recently. Which is not to say I wasn't reading, or that I wasn't enjoying reading my flist. It just - how many times can I write "wow", or "dies laughing", or "hugs" without feeling stupid? And recently I had no idea what to write in comments. So I didn't write anything. I have cool, smart, and witty people on my flist, and they write cool, smart, and witty things in their entries. And I think: "Cool!" and then "Hee!", and then again "Cool!" But, honestly, to write "Cool!" twenty times a day? No way.

All said above doesn't prevent me from sulking when I am not getting comments in my LJ. I can try to stay calm about it, and explain myself that people had better things to do, and they may have the same problems I do, or may be, different problems, and who said I write anything worth attention, and I am not here to get attention, anyway...

Who am I kidding? I love attention. I love to be flattered, pampered, and told that I rule the Universe. That is not the point.

And by now I totally forgot if I had any point at all. Feel free to skip this post. I love you all anyway.
avrelia: (Default)
Yep, that's me – as of now. I have no recollections of what I was going to do when return from Moscow, I have no idea what to do next, and then after it. Moscow seems unnaturally close every time I return to Canada from Russia. Although I forgot to buy some stuff I wanted to, didn't manage to go to some places I planned, and have no idea when I will be able to accomplish all this.

Internet wasn't accessible at my parents' home – due to decrepit communication lines – which was a pity as I had many beuatiful thoughts in this two weeks, and I am not sure I will remember any of them now. Of course, I could have just written them down, but no, we, the real heroes are not looking for the easy ways, we are looking for the most difficult, roundabout ones...

To my after-travelling confusion I added the weird feeling of being totally brainwashed by MS Windows. My husband changed our computer to Linux, and I feel very lost with all the different stuff. It is not worse, it is just different, I look at it and mourn my comfortable Windows corner – with pretty things, with Adobe Photoshop that I still have hope to learn, with its sense of normality... Brainwashed, I am.

And how can I edit pictures now? How?

Things are not that bad – I still have a lot of chocolate candies and the cranberry liquor, and will survive – definitely. Plus, tomorrow we are going to the birthday party and will have fun.

Speaking of birthdays – happy belated birthday to [livejournal.com profile] _green_ and [livejournal.com profile] janedavitt!!!

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